Trying to End the Isolation; Pilot Project to Reach Out to Survivors of Sexual Abuse

(July 9, 2007) -- For many adult survivors of child sexual abuse, life is often lived in isolation from the world around them.

Emotional trauma suffered at such a young age can often result in a lack of even the most basic of social skills - carrying on a conversation about the weather, meeting a friend for a coffee or offering a pleasant greeting to a cashier at a grocery store.

Over the course of the past six months, dozens of adult survivors of abuse and alleged abuse have testified at the Cornwall Public Inquiry about the impact the abuse had on their lives, and many times they spoke of feeling alone and isolate from society.

"About the victims, we are the walking dead," said Andre Lavoie, a man who was repeatedly sexually abused by a teacher as young boy. "We are geese whose wings have been broken."

A pilot project launched in Cornwall this week aims to repair some of that damage. The Gatehouse Adult Support Network is launching a program that will match volunteer mentors with survivors in an attempt to make them more resilient and better able to find their place in society.

The program is being funded as part of the inquiry's Phase 2 mandate to promote healing and reconciliation in the community.

"We are hopeful this program will help end the isolation experienced by some survivors," said Jamie Marsolais, administration and logistics assistant for the project. "The focus will be on social reintegration - getting people back into society in a meaningful way."

As an adult survivor of child sexual abuse, Marsolais himself would be in a position to serve as a mentor to other survivors.

"A mentor isn't necessarily a professional working in the area of sexual abuse," he said. "It can be a survivor who's doing well or someone who is familiar with issues surrounding child sexual abuse." Marsolais said the program may also serve to ease the caseloads of counsellors and therapists in the Cornwall area.

"Very often, survivors see their counsellors as the one person they can talk to so they want to see them quite often," he said. "If we can establish a partnership with a mentor whereby a survivor can have access to between two and four hours of that person's time a week, that would certainly make it much easier for counsellors knowing there's someone else in the survivor's life who they can go to for support."

In talking at the inquiry about the fact many of the effects of abuse last forever, Lavoie said victims often suffer alone and in silence.

"Each one of us responds to the abuse in slightly different ways, but the end result is that we are damaged for life," he said. "I was not worthy of love or success. (I lived a life) of loneliness ... living (in) what can only be described as emotional solitary confinement."

Combating that sense of isolation is a primary goal of the project. "It's about social reconnection," said Angela Gallant, education and consultation coordinator. "Survivors need to feel they are once again part of the human race, or perhaps that they're part of the human race for the very first time."

Gallant said mentors need not have a stack of academic degrees with their names on them in order to participate in the project.

"All we ask is that they be human," she said. "It doesn't have to be somebody who has a personal history of abuse. It can just be somebody capable of supporting somebody else in their emotional journey."

Training will be held in September for volunteer mentors and matches will be established shortly afterward. The project will include monthly monitoring of matches for a one-year period.

Survivors wishing to access the program must be referred by a counsellor, doctor or other professional. Potential mentors can contact Marsolais at 613-933-1375.

By: Terri Saunders
Source: Standard-Freeholder

Last reviewed: 07/07

Related Information:

• The Damage Caused by Sexual Abuse
• Coping with Memories Associated with Sexual Abuse
• Protecting your Children from Sexual Predators
• Be Caring, Cautions When Dealing with a Rape Victim
• Definition of Rape Escaping Hades
• Reporting Rape, Sharing Your Sexual Assault with Others
• Physical Effects of Rape,
• Sexual Healing After Sexual Abuse
• Sexual Intimacy After Sexual Assault or Sexual Abuse
• What is Date or Acquaintance Rape?
• Are You Vulnerable to Rape?
• Overview of 3 Main Date Rape Drugs
• Therapy 'No Cure for Sex Abusers'
• Teacher-Sex Outcome Sparks Outrage
• The Damage Caused by Sexual Abuse
• Sexually Abused Men
• Sexual Healing After Sexual Abuse
• Date or Acquaintance Rape
• The Male Survivor
• Coping with Memories Associated with Sexual Abuse
  The Body Remembers
• Getting Out of the Distorted Thinking Trap
• Reporting Rape, Sharing Your Sexual Assault with Others
• Rape Survivors Experience Guilt, Shame
• Trauma and Dissociation

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