Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited

Excerpts from the Archives
of the
Narcissism List

Part 1

1.Why does the narcissist devalue his source of secondary narcissistic supply?

ONE of the reasons is what you mentioned (I wouldn't like to belong to a club which will accept me as a member syndrome). But there are many others. For instance, the narcissist resents his dependence and by devaluing the object of dependence (his spouse, for instance), he gets rid of the dissonance.

Yet another issue:

The narcissist perceives intimacy and sex as a threat to his uniqueness and specialness. EVERYONE needs sex and intimacy - it is the great equalizer. The narcissist resents this equality. He rebels.

Sex and intimacy are usually also connected to past unresolved conflicts with important primary objects (also known as parents). They invoke these conflicts, encourage transference and provoke the onset of an approach-avoidance cycle.

Later in the week, I promise to post selected passages from Jeffrey Satinover who, despite being a Jungian, has a very clear psychodynamic model of these behaviors.

2. Narcissistic Mental Health Professionals

Mental health professionals are human. Many of them suffer from mental disorders. Many of them chose their profession simply to be able to cope with their own deficiencies and problems.

Unfortunately, not many of them are sufficiently conscientious. They engage in the delicate art of therapy long before they overcome their own problems.

They bring their problematic, even sick, selves into the therapeutical setting and, in doing so, they aggravate the mental state of the patient.

Analysts are supposed to work to solve their own problems prior to practicing. Therapists are supposed to work under supervision and to refer and defer to these outsiders. an outside perspective is often very helpful to them. But not all therapists and psychiatrists adopt these professional standards and work methods. This is unfortunate.

Being subjected to therapy administered by a narcissist must be a harrowing experience. It is no different to being married to a narcissist, or being brought up by a narcissist, or to having a narcissistic parent.

Willingly choosing to continue therapy with such a person was not wise. You say as much. But now is the time to derive lessons: stay away from narcissists and even from those whom you suspect of being narcissists. And ask yourself why did you choose to stay on as things got worse. The answer to this question is important.

Don't be discouraged and do continue therapy with someone else. Your growth and personal development are important and pressing needs. You will overcome this unfortunate encounter. All the victims of narcissists do. They emerge scarred but the wiser for it.

3. How to Cope with a Narcissist

Administer a modicum of narcissistic treatment (including verbal abuse) to the narcissist - and he/she is likely to vanish in a puff of indignant smoke. Narcissists shrivel, wither and die without narcissistic supply.

Humiliation, disagreement, criticism, comparison with others, mirroring the narcissist's behavior - are all great ways of getting rid of narcissists.

4. NPD Treatments - SSRI

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) per se is NOT treated with medication. It is usually subjected to talk therapy. The underlying disorder is treated by long-term psychodynamic therapy. Other personality disorders (NPD rarely comes alone. It usually appears with other PDs) are treated separately and according to their own characteristics.

But phenomena which are often associated with NPD - such as depression or OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) - ARE treated with medication. Recent research indicates that SSRI's (such as Fluoxetine, known as Prozac) might have adverse effects if the primary disorder is NPD. They sometimes lead to the serotonin syndrome which includes agitation and exacerbates the rage attacks typical of a narcissist. I didn't hear about the exacerbation of grandiosity due to SSRI consumption but I am keen on comparing notes. SSRI do lead at times to delirium and a manic phase and even to psychotic microepisodes, though.

This is not the case with the heterocyclics, MAO and mood stabilizers, such as lithium. Blockers and inhibitors are regularly applied without discernible adverse side-effects (as far as NPD is concerned).

Additional cognitive-behavioral therapies are often applied to OCD and sometimes to depression. To summarize:

Not enough is known about the biochemistry of NPD. There seems to be some vague link to serotonin but no one knows for sure. There isn't a reliable NON-INTRUSIVE method to measure brain and central nervous system serotonin levels anyhow, so it is mostly guesswork at this stage. Thus, as of now, the typical treatment is: Talk therapy (psychodynamic), Cognitive-behavioral therapy for OCD, and depression Antidepressants (with SSRI being currently under critical scrutiny)

5. Epidemiology of Narcissism

The figures seem to indicate that a minimum of 1% (probably 3% and perhaps up to 5%) of the population above the age of 10 are narcissists. Now, factor in the parents, spouses, colleagues, friends, children, the children's families ...

This is the biggest under-diagnosed mental health pathology ever. Many researchers also believe that all Cluster B personality disorders (Histrionic, Antisocial and Borderline) have a common thread of pathological narcissism. This is getting close to 10% of the adult population. Staggering numbers.

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