Improving Your Self-Worth and Building Self-Esteem

A person’s self-worth or self-value, is the key to a healthy self-esteem. People with low self-esteem don’t value themselves highly enough. They may believe they don’t deserve the best or that others are more important. Their low self-worth prevents them from speaking up or doing the things they want to do. Their own needs are neglected and it impacts on their quality of life.

Why People Have Low Self-Worth

Experiences from an early age may contribute to low self-worth. For example, it may be due to childhood abuse or neglect, bullies, critical parents or societal expectations.

As a society, we are conditioned to believe that our worth is based on external factors such as achievements, occupation or income rather than personal qualities. Many people have beliefs about what they should be doing or earning and that impacts on their self-value.

It’s human nature to focus on the negatives and too many people base their value on their perceived weaknesses. They overlook their good qualities. Others believe they’re not good enough unless they’re perfect, which will never happen. Additionally, comparing themselves to others brings many people down.

Improving Your Self-Worth

To improve your self-worth, you need to look inside yourself. Your value is who you are as a person, regardless of externals such as money, occupation or achievements. Comparisons with other people are futile.

Your self-worth is your own point of view. By changing your mindset you will build your self-esteem.

Tips on Improving Your Self-Worth

• Know that your own perception is a distorted version of reality. You’re more valuable than you believe.
• See the positives in yourself. Write them down or say them aloud.
• Nurture your strengths and passions. Do the things you’re good at and enjoy.
• Stop comparing yourself to others. There will always be people better than you at something. However, there are things you’re better at too.
• Embrace your individuality. We all have our unique qualities and that’s what makes us special.
• Find a purpose or meaning in what you do.
• Be part of a team or social group where everyone is valued.
• Let go of perfection. Love yourself in your entirety, imperfections and all.
• Accept that you can’t please everyone. There will always be critical people and you can’t control that. It’s usually a reflection of them rather than you.
• Help someone or volunteer. Make a difference to others.
• Set yourself some realistic goals and tick them off as you achieve them.
• Focus on the positive things you’ve done in your life.
• Get a reality check. Talk to friends or family who see your good qualities.
• Challenge your negative self-talk. Replace negative thoughts with positive ones.
• Use affirmations that work for you. E.g. “I deserve the best” or “I am worthy.”
• Get professional help if you need it. You’re not alone and there is support available.

Most importantly, know that you deserve to be a confident, happy person. Be kind to yourself and recognise your progress. You’re doing well to have come this far and every step takes you forward.

Increasing your self-worth is empowering. I experienced it first hand myself and you can do it too. Be persistent as permanent change takes time. You are worth it.

You can find Fay Agathangelou on Facebook, Google+ and Twitter.