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There's a well-known saying that goes, "Other people's opinions are none of your business," and when it comes to your journey to build self-esteem, this needs to be taken to heart. Self-esteem issues are often very connected to how much we allow other people's opinions to color our own. Read on to learn how my quest to build stronger self-esteem was affected by other people's opinions.
November is officially here, which means now is the time to create an eating disorder (ED) recovery action plan for the holidays. This season can be a minefield to navigate with an eating disorder, no matter where you're at in the healing process, so it's crucial to determine in advance how you will prioritize eating disorder recovery in the midst of whatever triggers you face these next couple of months.
I've already written about exercise in eating disorder recovery, but what I have not written about, specifically, is the role of strength training in eating disorder recovery. Everyone's road to recovery is different, but for me, taking the emphasis off weight loss through cardiovascular training and putting it on becoming stronger through resistance training was life-changing.
There is nothing worse than thinking you're going to get a good night's rest, only to find yourself tossing and turning for hours until your alarm goes off. A poor night’s sleep can impact the following day, leading to a loss in productivity and low energy levels across the board. When you have a mental health condition such as dissociative identity disorder (DID), these types of nights are common, but they don’t have to have a lasting negative impact on your overall quality of life.
Having undiagnosed mental health issues is really hard; I'm not going to lie. For so many years, I have craved having a distinct, definitive mental health diagnosis, but it just never seems to happen. I've had several diagnoses over the years, but none of them have ever really felt right. Sometimes I wonder if I'm the problem, if nothing will ever feel right for me.
Trauma is a difficult subject to discuss for some, especially when there is no "safe space" in which to have the conversation. I struggled with opening up about my traumatic past due to a lack of safe space to share these memories. In our lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, intersex, asexual, etc. (LGBTQIA+) community, it can be difficult to find someone who can hold a safe space for us without judgment. This leads to many individuals settling for a therapist or counselor who truly isn't meeting their needs.
Self-harm and isolation caused by the pandemic are a dangerous pair. Everyone is struggling to cope during these difficult times. Even the strongest and most resilient people I know have been affected by pandemic fatigue, which often comes with depression and anxiety symptoms. Unsurprisingly, our self-harm urges can also become worse as the future is so uncertain. It’s times like these that we need to look after one another and stay united.
Recovery may not look as expected, and I believe reshaping mental health recovery can be a tool to combat mental health stigma. By challenging the perception we have of recovery, it may help people understand that mental health struggles don't necessarily go away. Reshaping mental health recovery can contribute to stopping the idea that we should associate mental health struggles with willpower, contagion, and other harmful notions brought on by stigma. There are two keys ways I see to do this.
I often feel helpless because of bipolar disorder. I know we're all supposed to be empowered and in-control of our own destinies, but those things are an illusion at best, and bipolar is excellent at reminding me of that. All chronic illnesses, and for me, bipolar specifically, go with feeling helpless.
I've always been a hypersensitive person, so it's important that I create a comfortable work environment to thrive with bipolar disorder. For example, I don't process sudden, loud noises very well, and too much background chatter can completely overwhelm me. Fluorescent lighting hurts my eyes, and I can't concentrate if I'm too cold or if my immediate environment isn't colorful and inviting.
I read this book many years ago, just as I was entering the turmoil of remembering, questioning and doubting myself all the way (as I'd been covertly taught over a lifetime). I happened to mention to my two sisters one day, "This is so strange but I've been diagnosed with PTSD." Both my sisters surprised me by responding, "Me too."
THEN I happened upon an old book manuscript that my now deceased father had written (not published), wherein the protagonist was obviously based upon himself and he rapes his "fiancee," who had my unusual name. Yes, truly.
Then I made myself look at the peculiar memory I always had where he violently threatened me but somehow I had never been able to recall what came before or after the episode. I had to admit that was a bit strange.
The pressures and powers to forget sexual abuse are great, both in family and society. In fact, I've come to the sad conclusion that the vast majority of survivors never really deal with their childhood wounds (a neglect for which there are always repercussions).
To critique an encouragement of people trusting their intuition in such matters is really getting the prescription dangerously wrong.
Thanks!