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Depression is a family disease. Not just because it runs in families—but because it can ruin families.
Yet it doesn’t have to be that way. I am a happily married man with three wonderful children, and yet I suffer from depression. And my depression affects the whole family.
Children are incredibly perceptive. My 8-year-old picks up on it even when my bouts with depression aren’t so severe. My 10-year-old keeps things inside, so he rarely comments about it, but he notices.
Spirituality can ease the pain of mental illness, but where should clergy start when working with someone with severe mental illness? Here are some suggestions for clergy members who wish to help people with mental illness and their families.
The topic for this blog came from a phone conversation with someone in-my-circle-of-people-I-appreciate-and-trust. That's a mouthful. In other words: I have a difficult time trusting people. And this person, whom I have known for a verrrry long time (who I love very much), called me one the morning. As she usually does. Without hesitation.
So, What Happened?
ADHD affects conservatively about 5-8% of the world’s population. With the world’s population being around 7 billion…that’s a lot of people struggling with inattention, impulsivity or distractibility! Since math has never been my best academic subject, comprehending such a number has always been a bit hard for me. I guess it means that if I’m sitting in a room of 30 people, at least two or three of those people have a creative, overly active, easily distractible brain just like mine. Or when my child struggles in school, I know I am not alone, because approximately 200 other students/families are struggling with the same academic, homework, discipline and family chaos that me, my child and my family are experiencing.
Yes, psychiatric drugs can cause weight gain. It's not a rumor; it's not a myth; it's true. It's one of the most unfortunate things about medication.
But what can you do about drug-related weight gain?
Q: What is the definition of a split-second?
A: How long it takes the idiot behind you to honk after the light changes.
We all know him; the ill-mannered dolt snarling behind the wheel of a late-model luxury import, razor-edge aggressive, always at the ready to ensure that others make the sacrifices so essential to his success. He lives in the passing lane, climbing up from behind, riding bumpers, and flashing his lights. This is the guy who enjoys calling colleagues for no other reason than to put them on hold.
While none of us know him personally we do have the sense it would be easy to spot him at a party. Rude, impatient, obnoxious and tiresome! We all agree he’s a scourge, a menace, and a self-indulgent narcissistic cad – we love to hate him.
However, our wrath may soon be coming to an end as we revise our opinion and assume a kinder, gentler attitude. Why? Because, according to the AMA, AAA, AA, AARP and AAMCO what we are witnessing is no mere random amalgam of anti-social habits but symptoms of the latest in a long string of newly isolated illnesses.
I lived with an abusive man for 18 years, but truthfully, I didn't understand (or want to acknowledge) that he was abusive for 17 of them. I finally realized what was happening to me a bit more than a year before I left. During that year, I faithfully believed that he would also realize how his behaviors were affecting his family. I thought if I could somehow break through the illusion then he would see, and, more than that, he would want to change.
I failed in my efforts to change him, and that is how it is supposed to be. However, in my control-seeking quest to change my life by changing him, something remarkable happened. I changed my self. In the process, I kept track of what worked and didn't work for me. Perhaps you can identify with both my mistakes and successes.
According to HealthyPlace.com, the National Association of Psychiatric Health Systems reports that 88 percent of their member hospital admissions are voluntary. However, that other 12 percent does exist. Sometimes a person is so incapacitated by their mental illness that he/she may not recognize the need for inpatient treatment. In cases like these, involuntary treatment may become necessary.
I'd like to thank all of you for the kind words and shared stories regarding last week's posts regarding my son, Bob's first inpatient psychiatric facility admission. I have more to share on that matter, but I'm returning to the present today for the ongoing saga of the 504 Plan.
I wrote a post in October entitled Being a Mental Health Patient Requires Patience and want to expand on this as it is such a prominent part of recovering from mental Illness. I don't know about you, but patience is certainly not a virtue that I possess.
What the Hell is Patience?
I believe she will only be able to rid herself of her demons, and hopefully her BPD as well, when she's ready to confront the abuse of her father. If she can put the blame where it belongs, she may stop projecting that victim/perpetrator cycle on the present men in her life. These demons are a metaphor for the purgatory she has created for herself. That reality has consequences in the real world, but it need not be real in the tangible sense. Exorcising her demons will require the expenditure of real physical energy and probably the destruction of aspects of her personality. If this ever happens, and it's possible but not probable, then these demons will evaporate. They are only as real as one's personality is real. In short, reality is not the question, it's what you make of the things you feel to be real.