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Mom, can I have the keys to go meet Cheryl at the mall?”
“Dad, I just need the car for about an hour so I can take my friends to get some ice-cream.”
“Mom, it’s so hot out! Can I just drive to the pool?”
Not only do adults often drive more in the summer, particularly on highways while on vacation, but teens who are no longer confined to the school setting often drive more as well.
If you are an adult with ADHD or have a teen diagnosed with ADD, extra caution may be needed.
We know that trauma affects the brain. Science has proven that. Yet, have you ever had someone say to you any of these things:
"PTSD isn't real; it's all in your head."
"Just get over it already!"
"Only veterans get PTSD."
I speak all over the country about PTSD symptoms. Mostly, these audiences are comprised of civilians: survivors, caregivers and healing professionals. Sometimes, too, there are people who have no PTSD connection but have been invited to hear the presentation. Inevitably, whether it's before the presentation has started or after it has finished, someone addresses me to say some variation of one of those three things (on a really awful day, all three!).
Why don't people get what it means to struggle with PTSD?
My sign it was time to end an engagement to an abusive man was, well, a sign. Literally.
I didn't expect to fall in love and become engaged to an abuser, but I think my borderline personality disorder (BPD), as well as his BPD and bipolar diagnosis, played a role in the abuse. I was afraid of being abandoned almost as much as I was afraid of provoking him. I believed his insults and my abuser's promises to change. I thought I was the abusive one. (Read: How Did You Brainwash Me?) That is, up until I saw the sign that said "Taking my money is abuse. Stop it."
A professor of mine died last week after a long battle with pancreatic cancer. I had him during my first semester at university for a human spirituality course, and even though I didn’t know him well, I thought he was amazing and admired him very much. He was brilliant and charming and funny, and during the service, so many of his students and colleagues, peers, and other experts in his field spoke of how caring and gentle he was, how he could shrug off anything and just be at peace.
Giving thanks is something many do around Thanksgiving. We parents try to teach our children that saying thank you shows kindness to others (not to mention good parenting). But, what about saying 'thank you' to your child?
For reasons we might want to explore at some other time, I spent over 30 years toiling in the corporate vineyards as an advertising copywriter - an occupation which enjoys a level of social prestige roughly equivalent to that of garbage collector, lawyer, and snake oil salesmen - although to be sure - the latter group is begrudgingly afforded a modicum of respect since almost everyone abhors a squeaky snake. I know I do.
But I digress. Writers, as you know, are a disreputable lot. As a rule they live in culverts, subsist on scraps of food left by others in greasy spoon diners on the outskirts of town, frequently showing up for work with three days of stubble, pockets crammed with losing lottery tickets, reeking of bourbon and cheap cigars. The men are even worse!
As a bipolar dipsomaniac with a chronic attitude problem that includes contempt for authority, you can imagine I lost and found and lost employers the way others misplace car keys. Some jobs were submerged deep within the bowels of soul-less corporations shamelessly exploiting the witless populace, while others resided in neurosis factories referred to as advertising agencies where paranoia, throat slitting, and British wardrobes were passed off as creativity.
I have been finding out all sorts of things as of late about Adult ADHD and medication options. Since I watched those lectures by Dr. Russell Barkley (read Adult ADHD as Not a Gift), I've been looking into a bunch of the things he talked about -- and he definitely mentioned a lot about adult ADHD medications. This post is going to be half-informative, half-information-seeking. I know the adult ADHD drugs I've taken in the past for this disorder and I have questions about some that I haven't. Let's get started!
The self-stigma of having depression never really goes away. It is always there, scratching at the back of your mind, a constant reminder that you are weak, incapable, unworthy, fake, undeserving, lazy, ashamed, broken . . . the list goes on. The self-stigma of having depression can present itself whether you're feeling up or down.
Bullying leads to self-injury much of the time, and unfortunately, bullying has no age limit. During my teenage years, bullying was something that happened everyday and was talked about quite a bit. Classes talked about it and some teachers made their students do projects on the topic. However, bullying doesn’t end in high school – it continues through college and you can face workplace bullies, too. For me, bullying and self-injury go hand-in-hand.
Combat PTSD is defined as a specific type of posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) experienced by men and women who have been in combat. Combat PTSD can happen to anyone in combat, from those that have experienced live fire to those who are support workers in a war zone area. Not everyone in combat experiences combat PTSD, but many do.
I believe she will only be able to rid herself of her demons, and hopefully her BPD as well, when she's ready to confront the abuse of her father. If she can put the blame where it belongs, she may stop projecting that victim/perpetrator cycle on the present men in her life. These demons are a metaphor for the purgatory she has created for herself. That reality has consequences in the real world, but it need not be real in the tangible sense. Exorcising her demons will require the expenditure of real physical energy and probably the destruction of aspects of her personality. If this ever happens, and it's possible but not probable, then these demons will evaporate. They are only as real as one's personality is real. In short, reality is not the question, it's what you make of the things you feel to be real.