Age Regression in Dissociative Identity Disorder
Age regression occurs in dissociative identity disorder (DID) particularly, but also in other mental illnesses such as posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and major depressive disorder. While many people with DID have young or child alters, called littles, age regression is something different. So what is age regression, and how do you cope with it?
What Is Age Regression and Who Experiences It?
Age regression, in its simplest definition, is when a person regresses, or goes backward, in age. Age regression can occur spontaneously, or as is more often the case, because of a trigger. While not inherently harmful, regressing can be dangerous if the person is not in a safe place.
Age regression is common in people who have experienced trauma, especially abuse in childhood. There is no limit to how much a person can regress. People may or may not be aware they are regressing.
Age Regression in Dissociative Identity Disorder
Because people with DID have a history of childhood trauma, they are more susceptible to age regression. When people with DID age regress, it's not always a full dissociation or switch to another alter. They may feel like themselves, but yet not feel the right age. They may talk in a more childlike voice and have childlike mannerisms. Sometimes they are aware of these changes, but they don't feel like they have control of them. Other times, they are fully dissociated and not aware that they have regressed. They may look in a mirror and not see themselves.
It is also possible to age regress while experiencing a flashback. These instances are especially difficult because it can lead to reliving the trauma, which can increase suffering and keep the person stuck in a dissociative state.
Tips For Managing Age Regression in DID
While it's not possible to prevent age regression entirely, there are ways to manage and cope when it does happen.
Safety scripts are useful for those who experience age regression and flashbacks frequently. What the safety script says is up to the person and his or her needs, but including "My name is . . ." "I am [however many] years old." and "I am safe." are good statements to include. Keep the safety script in an easily accessible place, like a wallet, bag, or desk drawer, so you can read it when you feel yourself regressing.
Another way of coping with age regression is age progression. Try to determine what age you feel like you are. It's okay if you don't know the exact age -- take an educated guess. Then, work your way up slowly. If you feel like you are 10 years old, acknowledge that age and then slowly increase it at a pace that is comfortable for you, until you get to your actual age. Remind yourself that you are safe.
The best defense is to notice the warning signs. How do you feel before you experience age regression? What are the changes in your body? How does your mind feel? When you start to notice the signs, you can begin working on a plan to keep you as safe as possible when it does happen.
Lastly, don't be afraid to utilize your support systems. Let them know the signs of your experience with age regression. Tell them how they can help you get back to the present moment.
When you have DID, you won't always feel your age. But there is a way to get back to being yourself.
APA Reference
Matulewicz, C.
(2017, November 30). Age Regression in Dissociative Identity Disorder, HealthyPlace. Retrieved
on 2024, November 21 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/dissociativeliving/2017/11/age-regression-in-dissociative-identity-disorder
Author: Crystalie Matulewicz
In my honest opinion I myself think that it's not a good idea to help someone get past something if it's our problem as their partner I'm not their problem as an individual because a lot of age regressors do it because it's their safe place it's the last place of peace and innocence I myself and married to an amazing woman that has disassociative identity disorder she has 9 personalities and unless they cause her a problem or they're dangerous to her then I would never dream of changing her or her Alters her mind's created them for a purpose and one of them is 3 years old 1 is 11 and the rest are adult age and no matter which one they're in at any given time it's taking me a little while to get all the personalities confident and comfortable enough 2 conversate with me and confide in me but now that I have her trust in every form I found it that's the best way that I can help because she comes to me for comfort safety and advise because I'm understanding and not attempting to change her or her safe place no matter how frustrating or irritating one of the personalities can be it's an issue that she deals with daily so if you think it annoys and bothers you imagine what it's like for them every single day to never know who you're going to be next I know when it's going to change at any given moment and the greatest thing that I've ever done as build her confidence up to where she loves herself it would be cruel for me to take away the love for herself Supercross some things about one of her personalities wasn't fitting for me or bothered me if that was the case I'd say I didn't really love her so honestly the best I can explain to you from my own personal experience is don't help him change it or get over it helping embrace it and show him that there is absolutely nothing wrong with his alter if that's where he feels safe or comfortable then show him that you support him so that he feels that he has someone besides himself I need doesn't feel alone like I said this is all subjective and my opinion but I can tell you that I saved an amazing woman's life and she went from trying to kill herself daily coming out of a bad marriage 2 actually coming off of it medications now and smiles and laughs everyday and will tell anybody that for the first time in her life she's happy and feels free and loves who she is and that is the greatest feeling in the world to me to know that I was able to give that to her simply by showing her that it's okay to be herself no matter how young or irritable or whatever it is that it does just let him be there self you'd be amazed how much just showing them support for that will do I hope this helps if you have any questions feel free to email me jweasel52@gmail.com me and her both enjoy reaching out to people that have issues or are dealing with similar life experience life and let people know that there is hope Eid isn't something that you have to give up because of you can live happy with it
So very well put articulated and a lot of thought went into your post here Michael.
I've been diagnosed with did age regression I regress to 14 years old and it's been going on most of my adult life but just recently finally got it diagnosed and it clear and so many things up for my wife and I on so many levels. As long as the age regressor isn't putting an undue over the top experience constantly on the other in the relationship it's already hard enough to contemplate an actual LTR with that knowing it going into the relationship
I don't know I think it could be a real deal breaker for most once they really get an idea of what it can entail for the extremes.
for myself it doesn't work that way, it's I'm able to know when I'm there it's the most odd feeling it's it's hard to function it's hard to maintain a train of thought of anything because I'm just so hyper-focused on the staying in contact with the {{me}} that is not regressed/ but 14 years of age isn't bad at all it's certainly a lot better than two or three oh my goodness I couldn't imagine that
I myself am an age regressor, and can easily say there is nothing wrong with being one. im not trying to sound rude when I say this, but hear me out. when regressing, its ones safe place, and or safe state of mind, and there is nothing wrong with it. you shouldn't feel wrong for it, because its actually quite common. also, age regression is also not 100% of the time linked to DID, but is more commonly linked to childhood trauma, like you said. but, its better to let yourself regress rather than attempting to force yourself out if it. you can't really sit here and write and article about something unless you've experienced it first hand whether that be yourself or someone you know regressing.
Hey my name is Haley. I have moments when I feel like I’m two years old. I don’t really want to talk and all I want is to be held. Then it’s frustraiting because I don’t have any one to do that. When I’m angry I feel like an impulsive ten year old...but after I throw my fit I get sad and feel like I’m 2 again. Could I have DID?
To Haley- I am a girl in my late teens.I was never baptized as a baby,so when i was 14,my parents finially had me baptized at Easter vigil on Easter sunday with all the other preteens and teens.All of us girls had to wear the required white,poofy,short sleeve,top of the knees baptism dress and bonnet,with a tee shirt,cloth diapers,plastic pants under our dresses and lace anklets and white 'mary jane'shoes.My mom and gramma dressed me in the outfit and i felt like a little toddler girl!I liked the feeling of being like a baby or toddler and everyone thought i looked very cute! Later that summer,i was in a wedding as the senior flowergirl and i told mom i wanted to wear my baptism diaper and plastic pants under my flowergirl dress,so she put them on me.The next May when i was 15,i made my First Holy Communion with the other kids and us girls had to wear our baptism diaper,plastic pants and tee shirt under our communion dresses.Again,i felt like a toddler and loved the feeling!After my party was over,i got up on my dads lap and he cuddled me and i felt so happy and content! I started wearing the diaper and plastic pants and tee shirt more often after that and even to bed at night sometimes and before i would get into bed ,dad would cuddle me.I am now 18.going on 19 and still like wearing my diaper and plastic pants and feeling like a baby and being cuddled.
I finially made my First Holy Communion at age 15 with the class of 2nd graders! My parents,along with my gramma and aunt bought my communion outfit and told me i would be dressed as a little girl! They got me a short sleeve,quite poofy,top of the knees communion dress and veil with lace anklets and white 'mary jane' shoes.They then got me a white tee shirt to waer as my top under my dress and then a cloth diaper was made for me from sewing a package of baby diapers together to make the one diaper.They got a pair of white adult size plastic pants to go over the diaper which fit me loose and crinkled! The morning of the ceremony,i was put into the outfit and joined my class.I felt somewhat weird being 15 and dressed like the little girls.The plastic pants over my diaper crinkled the whole time when i walked and mom and gramma and aunt thought it was so cute!My boyfriend,Justin,who was 16,came to my party and was blown away by the fact that i was like a 'little girl'! After my party we were alone and started kissing and after a few minutes he put his hand under my communion dress and felt my diaper and plastic pants and became very aroused!Sadly to say,he got my communion dress off of me and got me to my knees and made me give him oral sex!
To Hannah and Clarice-Both of you were dressed correctly for your First Holy Communions! At my parish,the girls are required to wear the cloth diaper and plastic pants and white tee shirt under their poofy white dresses for baptisms,First Holy Communion and Confirmation! They are especially required for the teen girls since they are the ones who become sexually active and the cloth diapers and plastic pants and tee shirt send them a message that purity and innocence is perfectly acceptable before marriage!
This is a true story and actually happened to me and my twin sister! We grew up in a medium size town in central Illinois.When sis and i were 15 our parents decided to join the local catholic parish in town.We were told that sis and i would have to recieve our first sacrement of baptism upon joining,then make our First Holy Communion a year later.The Baptism director told us and our parents that our baptisms would be done during sunday mass.Me and sis and our parents were then handed a sheet of paper listing our required all white baptism outfit.The Baptism director went over the list with us and sis and i were shocked to see what we had to wear! The required outfit was a white,knee length,short sleeve baptism gown with a matching bonnet,white tee shirt,cloth diaper,rubberpants [plasticpants],white tights and white mary jane style shoes!She told us that since we were new,that we had to be like babies joining gods family.Sis and i were quite upset! Our parents ordered identical gowns and bonnets for us and two pair of white,adult size rubberpants.We had to get the tee shirts,diapers and the tights and shoes!Our baptisms were set for three weeks later. With in the next two weeks,we got the tee shirts,high waist tights,two packages of the 24x27 inch cloth diapers and diaper pins and the white mary jane style shoes.Mom sewed the 10 cloth diapers in each package together to make one diaper for each of us.The next week,our gowns,bonnets and the rubberpants came in and we went to the parish and picked them up.The gowns were just like infant gowns only in tee size as were our bonnets and the rubberpants were just like babypants only in adult size!The weekend of our baptisms,mom took sis and i to get our hair and nails done,then we got ready for our party sunday after noon.Sunday morning,we went to the bridal dressing room where mom pinned the diaper on sis and i,then we put on the rubberpants,tights and tee shirt,then our gowns and last our bonnets.We both felt like over grown babies! Mom and dad took sis and i to the Baptism directors office to get checked out.We were then baptized as babies during mass and it was somewhat embarrassing!
You two girls were dressed properly for your baptisms! Many parishes do baptisms at Easter vigil and it is a tradition for the girls being baptized to be dressed as babies to show that they are pure and innocent and worthy of entering gods kingdom.When we baptized our daughter at 16 at Easter vigil,we dressed her as a regular baby in a white,just below the knees,short sleeve baptism gown with the matching bonnet,lace socks and white booties.Under her gown,she wore a cloth diaper with babyprint rubberpants over it and a tee shirt as her top.
To Haley-I am 17 and like you,i have periods when i also feel like i am two years old and want to held and cuddled! My dad is in the military so he is not around.I too throw fits and then feel like a two year old again! What helps me is,i have a 14 year old niece who is a bedwetter and wears cloth diapers and rubberpants to bed everynight.i have seen her wearing them and she looks like a toddler,as she wears a footed ,zip up the front,footed pajama.I took some of her diapers and rubberpants and when i am feeling down and like a two year old,i put on the diapers and rubberpants and regress to a two year old.My boyfriend cuddles me while i am wearing the diapers and rubberpants and after a while i feel much better! Maybe you might try them and see if they help you when you feel like a two year old.
Hi, I was in an abusive relationship all through high school and then some other things happened as well, I haven’t officially been diagnosed with PTSD but my therapist said it’s likely I have it and I saw that age regression can be part of that. I feel like I experience age regression constantly when I’m around my boyfriend wether I’m happy or angry or sad, and then when I leave I feel so awful and stupid for acting like such a child...he’s made comments about not acting like a child before because I guess I’m just frustrating in that state but I don’t know how to explain all this to him without sounding like I’m just making up excuses..do you have any tips or ways I could talk to him about it?
Talking to him about it can be difficult, especially if he doesn’t have a good understanding of mental health issues. If you are comfortable with it, it might be easier to talk to him about the PTSD before age regression specifically. Send him a few links of articles you find relate to you. Your therapist may even be able to help explain things to him.
Hi- I was reading your article and saw that you mentioned age regression can also happen in other mental illnesses such as PTSD or MDD both of which I have. MDD is officially diagnosed; the PTSD is not official but my therapist says that it’s highly likely that I have it. I was just wondering if you had any articles that I could read about those associations with regression as opposed to just in DID or if it acts the same way. Thank you very much!!
I don’t have any articles talking specifically about age regression within MDD, but the mechanisms are the same. You can use the same methods to reverse the regression as the ones listed in this article.
I've gotten into a new relationship about 2 months ago. He's into the whole ddlg lifestyle. I'm aware that age play and age regression are two different things. How can I explain to him that when I regress it isn't in a sexual way? I get nervous around him when I feel like I'm getting PTSD triggers because I'm worried he will take it the wrong way. I don't mind what he is into. I'm into it to an extent as well. I just need to figure out how to help differentiate between the two since I don't go as far as to wear diapers or anything for age play. So I just think it will get misunderstood. I guess one way is that I feel in control with age play and with regression it just happens on its own. Usually I find my inward self as an adult and my outer self is childlike. Normally I feel a little the other way around. Is that normal to feel that way? Like to feel like I'm a child on the outside and an adult on the inside. Because I can still think like an adult. But what comes out in words or actions is childlike.
Hi hi, I regress too but I have found in that community even if you are a regressor it can be kinda weird on where to start lace yourself. I found ddlg but I’m leaning more towards cgl ( I do have a caregiver when I do regress). Talk it out with him. My last person who was into ddlg took advantage of me when I slipped into little space (I regress about 4yrs to toddler) & no I don’t want wear diapers.
I usually feel little always have but couldn’t never figure out why until recently when I started regressing all of a sudden. Sorry if I’m rambling. All in all sit him down & go over things that you are comfy with also research. Best of luck?
Hey so I don’t know if I have this or not but I was sexually abused and physically abused as a child from infant to 4 and got adopted at 6 and I find myself talking like a baby a lot more at the age of 20 and it it started at 16 . I twirl my hair like I used to when I was a kid and I currently find my saying mama while I’m like half asleep . My gf had Calle dme out on talking like a baby and being immature and I tell her I can’t help it and half the time I don’t even realize it . I don’t know what to do ! I have PTSD, ODD, ADHA, OCD
Can people with DID let out their alters willingly and control when they come out ?
Hi Renzo,
Some people do say that they can control their alters in that way, but that’s not common. It is possible to reduce triggers that can lead to alters coming out, however. That takes a lot of time and work within your system to get to that point.