Look Inside of OCD
Doubt is thought's despair; despair is personality's doubt. . .;
Doubt and despair . . . belong to completely different spheres; different sides of the soul are set in motion. . .
Despair is an expression of the total personality, doubt only of thought. -
Søren Kierkegaard
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Here I will be placing contributed descriptions and stories from people living with OCD.
As this page grows, it will be very useful in helping those who care about us understand a little more about what it is like to have OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder). It will also be useful for people who think they might have OCD or something to read a description that resonates with them.
It's an interesting exercise to try and write down what it is like to have an obsession. Go on give it a try and send me the results, which I will be glad to post either attributed or not - your call.
If you wish to contact one of the authors and their E-mail is not with their story, you may contact me and I will forward your message
"I'm not sure where to begin. It all began in 1997 when we moved. I had my first "attack" of anxiety. It came on so quickly I didn't even know what it was..."
" I wish I could do something. What's wrong with me anyhow? This is really nuts."
"I've never known life without OCD. From as far back as I can remember intrusive, unwanted thoughts and fears have plagued me."
"I think it was approx.1989 when I first experienced OCD behavior.I didn't recognize it as such but now, thinking back, it was OCD."
"The first genuine OCD experience that I can remember happened to me when I was about 6 years old. It happened one morning. . ."
"It's like you can't believe anything you tell yourself because you might be wrong. "
"My main disorder is checking things. I have made sure the drip coffee pot was off a couple thousand times, "
"My wife was terrified hearing all these things from me as well. Luckily, I went to a psychiatrist who diagnosed this problem correctly "
"My other obsession is with death. Everyday I am plagued with thoughts of death, that of loved ones and/or myself. "
"It began for me as lists. At any given time, I have 10 lists. I have a front page of the lists that I have in my list packet, and then I have the various lists."
"I couldn't sleep, couldn't go out of the house, etc. I went to him and went on a program of cognitive behavior therapy, medication and, very importantly, meditation. The meditation was key."
"My name is Fred and I have suffered with OCD as long as I can remember. It started when I was a little boy. I am 37 years old now and I have had relief for the past 6-7 years, after finally being diagnosed with the disorder."
"I am 24 and have been suffering from OCD as long as I can remember. It got extremely severe when I went away to college this past September. It got so bad that I had to take a sick leave."
"At around 35 years of age I began to question why I had to check things all the time - are the car lights really turned off, did I make a mistake in the work I did today (better recheck it), etc..."
"I am sharing my story because I want others to know that OCD is not just about washing, checking or other rituals. There is another horrific side to this illness, and I want others to know that they are not alone and should not feel shame for thoughts they cannot help."
"shining down on me a vision dances perfect, her wisdom innocent she tries to free the parts i keep sheltered, locked behind the doors, safe"
"I guess my story will sound quite familiar but it still feels shocking to me. I still cannot believe that this is happening to me."
"It reached its worst point around 20-21. I was obsessed about diseases. HIV was a huge deal and at times still is, though I have been tested and am fine. I was bed ridded with this disorder. I could not touch certain colors. "
"I am a 30 year old woman with 3 children, my first experience with OCD I was 19 years old and it was on Thanksgiving Day. For as long as I live I will never forget that day."
"The first thought was my mind telling me that I wanted to molest my little cousin, then my mind started telling me that I was a lesbian even though I had never been physically attracted to a girl before. Then my mind started..."
" My OCD started when I was 7 years old. When I was supposed to be asleep one night, I couldn't stop counting to 100 and I started crying."
"Three separate psychiatrists failed to diagnose OCD (or if they did they weren't letting me in on the diagnosis) and I eventually endured four years of psychoanalytical therapy which was of no value to me at all (having lightened my bank account of $10,000)."
"When I was in sixth grade, I was first introduced to a "new" virus called HIV. It was during a Health/Sex Education class where we learned about this disease..."
" I was first introduced to OCD through my son. I knew when he was very young that something was different about him, I just couldn't put my finger on it. It started out with food..."
" my earliest memory of an ocd obsession was around 4-5 years of age. i noticed a neighbor's cat with a dead mouse in its mouth, and i was fascinated. i remember telling my mother about the sight, and her response was, "oh, you didn't touch it did you?"
" I was totally paralyzed form the inside out. I heard only loud noises reverberating in my brain. I shouted at myself all the time just to keep the noise out, just to drown out the white noise in my head. I felt like I was sharing brain space with a roaring lion."
" I Have been suffering with OCD, anxiety and depression from the time I was 7 yrs old. OCD for me started out with me washing . . ."
I am not a doctor, therapist or professional in the treatment of CD. This site reflects my experience and my opinions only, unless otherwise stated. I am not responsible for the content of links I may point to or any content or advertising in HealthyPlace.com other then my own. Always consult a trained mental health professional before making any decision regarding treatment choice or changes in your treatment. Never discontinue treatment or medication without first consulting your physician, clinician or therapist. Content of Doubt and Other Disorders |
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APA Reference
Gluck, S.
(2009, January 9). Look Inside of OCD, HealthyPlace. Retrieved
on 2024, December 21 from https://www.healthyplace.com/ocd-related-disorders/articles/look-inside-of-ocd