Abandonment issues are probably more common than one would expect, especially for recovering addicts. The fear of abandonment, attachment issues, a history of bad breakups, a difficult family dynamic, and many more unfortunate circumstances can all lead to a disdain for abandonment. In my addiction recovery, I have noticed that the real or perceived feelings of abandonment can lead to some really challenging addiction triggers for me.

For me, choosing to take antidepressants in addiction recovery has been a great choice. After fighting through years of active addiction and a few years of addiction recovery, I have finally decided to work on my mental health struggles with a psychiatrist. My addiction to sex and pornography started roughly ten years ago in high school, but I didn't actually pursue recovery until years later in my early twenties. Amidst the fight against this devastating addiction, I was also consumed with a number of mental health disorders ranging from generalized anxiety, posttraumatic stress disorder, and most recently, depression.

What can a dual diagnosis of substance abuse and bipolar lead to  --homelessness., incarceration or broken relationships. I was a walking dead person for a decade, while my co-occurring mental illnesses were left untreated. After receiving proper treatment for bipolar and and my dual diagnosis substance abuse disorder, I have found a fresh hope.

I have a mental illness and an addiction. I honestly didn’t care if I lived or died, during my decade long drug and alcohol addiction. Which is why I tried and failed at sobriety so many times. My addictions co-occurred with a mental illness called bipolar disorder. A depressive stage of bipolar, even sober, can leave me hopeless. I'd lose interest in all the things that mattered to me before. It didn’t matter to me if I got sober. There were no consequences strong enough to make me want to stop because I didn’t care if I ever saw tomorrow. I didn’t make plans for my future because I really didn’t want one. It was a slow suicide.

The winter blues are here and for those of us in all types of recovery, they can be especially tough (Stop Letting Winter Depression Freeze Your Happiness). If you're a recovering addict or alcoholic with the winter blues setting in, you are not alone.

People with substance abuse issues are at higher risk for suicide than those who do not abuse substances. Research suggests that individuals with substance use disorder are nearly six times more likely than others to report having attempted suicide at some time.

This week is National Eating Disorder Awareness week, and I think it is important to highlight the link between eating disorders and substance abuse. As a person who struggled with both, I feel it is important to bring awareness of statistics and research in this area.

I took off a week off blogging, and after a mini breakdown of anxiety and panic attacks, I wanted to discuss in detail the importance of self care, and healthy coping skills not only in early sobriety, but in life as well. I will be on vacation next week and feel really passionate about this topic so I did two vlogs to talk about struggles, healthy coping skills, self care, and how it is important to take care of ourselves before we can help anyone else. I hope you enjoy and look forward to coming back in two weeks refreshed from my vacation off all media, internet and lounging by the pool in palm springs! If you want a funny puppy story definitely watch the second video :)