The federal government reimbursed the executive's company, which billed Medicare for between $20 million and $40 million in bribes that were disguised as salaries, the executive admitted.

Peter Alexis, former "administrator of the year" for Psychiatric Institutes of America, pleaded guilty to conspiracy and false-statement charges before U.S. District Judge Joe Kendall in Dallas. He said he helped bribe more than 50 physicians across the nation.

Mr. Alexis agreed to become a prosecution witness in a nationwide investigation, and prosecutors agreed not to seek additional charges against him.

Judge Kendall asked Mr. Alexis several times whether he was aware of the rights he waived with his guilty plea.

After Mr. Alexis repeatedly stated that he is voluntarily exposing himself to as many as 10 years' imprisonment, Judge Kendall replied: "I'm just wondering how many doctors out there in the Dallas-Fort Worth area aren't sleeping too well these days."

At Judge Kendall's request, Mr. Alexis explained his role in what he said was a companywide conspiracy. "I paid physicians to refer patients to our hospitals," Mr. Alexis said.

"So, it was just a mass kickback scheme? You were buying patients?" the judge asked.

"Yes, your honor," Mr. Alexis replied.

Mr. Alexis served for several years as administrator at Psychiatric Institute of Fort Worth. He became PIA's vice president for the Texas region in 1989 but resigned in 1990 after some patients complained that they had been hospitalized unnecessarily so that PIA officials could collect huge sums from insurance companies and Medicare programs.

He declined to comment after the hearing Monday.

"Mr. Alexis is the highest-ranking PIA executive to plead guilty, so far," U.S. Attorney Paul Coggins said. The continuing FBI investigation is nationwide in scope, Mr. Coggins said.

"There will be many other states affected by this investigation, " Mr. Coggins said. "We think this case may take months or even years to resolve."

Doctors weren't the only ones bribed, Assistant U.S. Attorney Christopher A. Curtis said. He said that illegal payments also went to therapists and social workers.

Psychiatric Institutes of America was absorbed last year by its corporate parent, National Medical Enterprises Inc.

Diana Takvam, a spokeswoman at NME's headquarters in Santa Monica, Calif., declined to comment on Mr. Alexis' courtroom statements.

Ms. Takvam, however, said NME is attempting to negotiate a settlement with officials at the Department of Justice and has "established a reserve of $375 million."

NME has not yet agreed to pay that money to the government, Ms. Takvam said.

Another NME official previously reported that the firm is selling or shutting down all of its psychiatric hospitals in Texas.

According to a written statement, NME officials hope that the proposed agreement with the Department of Justice "will close all open investigations of NME."

Judge Kendall told Mr. Alexis that he could not predict how many of the possible 10 years federal officials will recommend under sentencing guidelines. But he advised Mr. Alexis that federal law no longer permits parole, and he said the defendant should not expect a minimum sentence.

"Without even looking, I would guess that your guidelines . . . will be off the charts," the judge said. Judge Kendall did not immediately schedule a sentencing hearing for Mr. Alexis. He said he will wait to review the depth of Mr. Alexis' cooperation with prosecutors.

"The prudent thing to do would be to sentence you sometime off in the future," the judge said.

next: Famous Shock Therapy Patients
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NOTE: Since about 1982 the soft, soothing sounds of the ocean have been by friend and have lured me to sleep with the help of my trusty CD player. In a former relationship, after a date, my lover and I would kiss goodnight and the last thing I would say to her was, "See you at the beach." She knew that once I arrived home and my head hit the pillow I would go to my island for an imaginary rendezvous with her. The following poem describes my special island where my lover and I would meet. The link to "At the Beach... Alone Again" at the bottom of this page cronicles the completion of the relationship. - Larry James

I go to bed alone and close my eyes.

I hear the sound of the sea crashing against the rocks, then experience the momentary quiet as the ocean waves return to the open sea only to come crashing against the rocks again moments later.

I love the smell of the ocean. And when I sit on the rocks, I love the touch of the waves rolling over me.

I've been coming here to my private little island for many years now.

Always alone.

Before you - while waiting for your beautiful brown eyes to find me - I designed a sand castle or two by the seashore, skipped flat stones on the water by the brook in the meadow, and threw driftwood back to the sea.

I thought about someday having you here with me. And I didn't know who you were.

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Once, I scribbled words of desperation on a piece of paper. I stuffed it into a bottle, then threw it into the sea. "Please God, send someone who loves me and someone I can love! Whoever finds this, I love you!"

Then, there you were.

Like some new flower, beautiful and ready to be picked.

And, oh, how I loved you.

"It's our first night on the beach together. Take a chance on me. Lie down and leave your imprint in the sand, right there, beside mine."

Two imprints in the sand where there was once only one; far enough from the shore so high tide could not disturb the memory of our being there together.

I can see your beautiful body on pure white sand, laying next to me. This island's population is but two. This beach belongs only to me and you.

I remember being locked in passionate embrace, counting out the stars together.

A cozy fire of driftwood, from wood we gathered while hunting coconuts, gave us warmth as we fell asleep in each others arms; the sounds of the sea our lullaby.

Best friends and lovers.

From now to forever. . . together.

Ours is a love that knows no boundaries.

This morning we'll wade along the shoreline, make love again and count some more stars tonight.

I love to watch you brush the white sand from your cute little behind. I love the sand and I love you.

When we are together we often cling to each other as the sand to your body.

We love to run, holding hands, along the water's edge. We play. We love and spend time digging clams and just being together.

Occasionally we pause to rest by sitting on a small weather-beaten boat, once turned upside down and now long forgotten by its skipper. Nearby, one solitary oar points westerly, buried partially in the sand.

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Knee deep in the water, we knelt, facing each other, as if to pray. Together, our clasped hands reach toward the heavens. Our lips came together as the ocean gently made love to our bronze bodies. The waves are clumsy but they are kind.

As we lie together, the afternoon sun gently kisses our sun-kissed bodies and warms the sand as I count the freckles sprinkled over your beach-brown shoulders.

I love being with you, touching you, kissing your body and watching you enjoy the warmth of the sun.

The distant clouds seem to smile as they watch over the place where we lay.

As leaves blow along the beach, the bleached starfish are washed upon the shore.

I put a seashell to my ear and hear your soft voice whisper, "I love you."

As the friendly winds gently wake the palms, I show you secret places on our island known only to me. Places, created by God, made only to share with my lover.

Hand in hand, we walk through dense green foliage. We follow a path, only my feet have known, to where a crystal clear stream invites us to bathe together like Adam and Eve on our very own island paradise.

The birds of the island join in joyful chorus to sing songs of peace, love and harmony.

We take pause from our island adventure to savor the meat of a freshly cracked coconut.

We feel the mist from the island's solitary mountain fall gently upon our skin as we frolic beneath coconut trees near the waterfall in the meadow.

Thanks for the raspberries you picked for me along the way.

Lovers on the beach.

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Sleeping on your pillow of driftwood, I lie here, next to you, on our bed of white sand, experiencing our closeness, matching you in sleep breath for breath, yet awake.

Now that you lie sleeping, I'll take a moment to quietly tell you all the things I never say when you're awake.

Deep within slumber, you manage a smile. I know you hear me. I love you.

I let you sleep because I love to watch you all disheveled and unwound, dressed up in your undress.

Lying close, in your shadow, I fall asleep.

We sleep well together.

I have often been alone on the beach to spend quiet moments with my thoughts about what it would be like to be with you forever.

I love to be with those thoughts because I love you and I want to be with you wherever you are.

That I only love you, is not enough. I love you unconditionally!

I cherish the thought of a forever love relationship with you!

We've been so long at the beach we taste like the sun.

We walk in the sea breeze to the water's edge for a quick splash of cool ocean.

The beads of water on your beautiful body glisten as we walk to our favorite spot on the beach for making love.

Some would say the sun is much too hot today for love. It matters not to us.

Your eyes tell me you want me.

You only have to look at me, that's all.

Your body says, "Come closer, my love."

You wear nothing but a lavender orchid in your hair; my island angel in the sun.

We touch and I feel your body sizzle from the heat of our passion.

Your skin is soft as angel's breath.

I brush gently against your breasts and we tingle as we touch. The fire inside visibly expresses; soft lips to soft lips; thigh to thigh. How perfectly we fit together.

My hands trace new and exciting memories all over your body.

Our hot bodies communicate only words of love; so softly; words only our heart can hear and understand.

And your eyes, set on fire by desire, were made to dance by whispered sighs of love and the passion of the moment.

I quietly speak your name. "Oh, God, I love you."

The sound fades into the wind as we become lost together, somewhere out there; our brief escape to where only total trust and pure love are present.

Ecstasy!

We smell like love.

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How far away this world becomes in the harbor of each other's arms.

I want to forever be with you.

Friendly seagulls wink as if to nod their approval as we come together in the sand.

In the afterglow, we hold each other, oh, so closely.

We watch as the dolphins gracefully dance with the water. We know they know.

Suddenly an ocean breeze begins to stir, cooling our bodies - anticipating our need for it - following our passion on the sand.

Afternoon shadows gather as the sun prepares to go to sleep.

Our love has a magical quality. Who knows, in the quietness of our love, we may even see the wind together.

Now, I stand watching as you walk down the beach. Oh God, will this be the last time? I don't want to be alone again.

What will happen if I am not to again know your warm arms, your soft, suntanned shoulder next to my face in the late afternoon sun, your lips against mine?

I try hard to memorize you, knowing it may later be important. I remember the way you walked and the way you looked back over your shoulder at me.

Were we imaginary lovers only?

Was this the sound of farewell I hear screaming silently in my ears?

Do you think I'd dare to leave you walking lonesome on the beach into someone else's summer?

I still long to see you one more time coming down the beach.

I wonder if the time will ever pass till we're together even for a while again.

I'm sorry no one was there to see how happy we were together.

The clouds were sad today.

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No dolphins came to play.

The seagulls lament.

I remember how I cried when my first snowman melted. The snow, it kept falling, worthless, like the tears you cry over lost love.

How can we be sure of anything? The tide changes. Has it changed that much for us?

I'm not sure what all this means. Will the good times suddenly be forgotten? Nay! I will not sleep without your memory.

I wonder why I cannot shake our true love from my mind.

It may be that we built our love only on memories and make them more than what they were. It must be or wouldn't you still be here? I dare not say for I do not know.

I pray God allows the memories not to fade.

And lovers? They sometimes go away.

That time of loving may not come again, so I'll just add the precious times we had together to my collection of warm and wonderful memories.

Perhaps if the love we share could be unconditional, and maybe if we never allowed the presence of past hurts to affect the love and devotion we feel for each other today; or. . . what if by daily reaffirming our commitment to speak only words of love, acceptance, understanding and forgiveness we could learn to love unconditionally? Are there some answers we can ponder?

When all of the old memories I call back to help me sleep don't work, maybe I'll try thinking about pop tarts and dixie cups half filled with luke-warm coffee.

Or maybe, in my mind, I'll return to the beach, to again be with you.

I can, at will, if I choose, always create in my imagination my lovely paradise with you.

I will take no other lover to our beach. Only you.

When I think of love and loving, I'll remember you.

For myself, I've kept your smile.

If I tried, and I will not try, I could blot out all but your beautiful brown eyes. Your eyes always told the truth about the depth of love you felt for me. Your eyes never lie. Not even now.

Because I have memories, I will never be alone.

I guess I'll spend some time letting myself come first for a while. And when I tumble into sleep yours will be the last face I will see.

In loving you I've held back no reserve and so I've nothing left to give tomorrow's lover when you go.

See you at the beach!

We Get LoveNotes. . . "Your poems about the Beach were both breathtaking. I was touched by your inner-thoughts so wonderfully put into words."
Anita
A True Believer in Love

next: Release Your Brakes!

WHEN YOU TAKE more responsibility for something than you actually have control of it, you're making yourself unnecessarily miserable.

If it wasn't really your fault or if it is something you really can't control, then taking responsibility for it, feeling that it is your fault, makes you feel bad and affects your health negatively.

If you feel responsible for something, ask yourself if you really can control the outcome. If not, give up your responsibility.

To learn more about how to do that, check out:
Stress Control

Dale Carnegie, who wrote the famous book How to Win Friends and Influence People, left a chapter out of his book. Find out what he
meant to say but didn't about people you cannot win over:
The Bad Apples

An extremely important thing to keep in mind is that judging people will harm you. Learn here how to prevent yourself from making this all-too-human mistake:
Here Comes the Judge

The art of controlling the meanings you're making is an important skill to master. It will literally determine the quality of your life. Read more about it in:
Master the Art of Making Meaning

Here's a profound and life-changing way to gain the respect and the trust of others:
As Good As Gold

What if you already knew you ought to change and in what way? And what if that insight has made no difference so far? Here's how to make
your insights make a difference:
From Hope to Change

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next: How News Distorts Reality

Abstract

Br J Psychiatry 1983 Jan;142:1-8
Author(s):Squire LR; Slater PC
Abstract: Self-reports of memory problems have been evaluated prospectively in depressed patients receiving bilateral ECT or unilateral ECT, and in depressed patients receiving treatments other than ECT. Depressed patients did not complain of poor memory at seven months after hospitalization. Compared to bilateral ECT, right unilateral ECT was associated with only mild memory complaints. At three years after treatment approximately one-half of the persons who had received bilateral ECT reported poor memory. These reports seemed to be influenced by three factors: (1) recurrence or persistence of conditions that were present before ECT; (2) the experience of amnesia initially associated with ECT and a subsequent tendency to question if memory had ever recovered; and (3) impaired memory for events that had occurred up to six months before treatment and up to about two months afterwards.

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