It can be hard to feel motivated and confident even on good days. Learn how to feel motivated with this DBT skill. It will get you feeling motivated and more confident fast.

It’s important to do the things you’re not comfortable with to build self-esteem. That means stepping outside of your comfort zone and challenging yourself. Naturally, you may resist doing this because it might make you anxious, fearful or just plain uncomfortable. Stepping outside of your comfort zone does take effort and it might seem easier to do nothing. However, sticking to what you’re familiar with can keep you stuck and it can damage your self-esteem. In order to create change, you need to challenge your negative feelings and do it anyway. Do the things that you’re not comfortable with and build your self-esteem.

It’s important to stop quitting the things you enjoy just because you're not confident. If you’re like many people, you may be depriving yourself of things you enjoy simply because you’re not good at them or feel inadequate. Perhaps you don’t try something because you’re afraid of exposing your weaknesses or imperfections, you fear making mistakes or you fear failure. Perhaps you compare yourself to others or worry too much about what others think. You might feel vulnerable and that can be very uncomfortable. However, doing things for the sake of enjoyment is important for your self-esteem, mental health and overall wellbeing. Stop quitting the things you enjoy just because you're not confident.

Identifying your good qualities can be challenging when you believe you’re worthless or have low self-esteem. When you’re feeling worthless, your negative thoughts distort your perception of yourself and you overlook the positives. However, they’re not the truth even though you might believe it. No matter who you are, you are not worthless and you do have good qualities. Identifying your good qualities even if you feel worthless can help guide you to the things you’re suited to, find meaning or purpose in your life, and most importantly, to see your own worth so you can build your self-esteem.

Setting intentions can improve your confidence and belief in your abilities. An intention is a like a goal, but more powerful and effective, in my opinion. Intentions are the dreams that you want to achieve and the feelings you want to bring into your life. The short-term gains from setting intentions are that they can help you get a grip on negative thoughts to more neutral or positive ways of thinking the long-term gains from setting intentions may be improved confidence.

People need to stop being perfectionists. Being a perfectionist is destructive to your self-esteem, mental health and general wellbeing. However perfectionism is a common self-esteem problem that can be hard to recognise. If you’re like many people, you might be asking, “What’s wrong with being a perfectionist?” Perfection can easily be confused with having high standards but they're not the same. High standards can be healthy, productive and good for your self-esteem. However, a perfectionist will have standards that are unreasonable, unhealthy and counterproductive. It’s important to recognise perfection as a problem. Here's how to stop being a perfectionist. 

Volunteer activities build self-esteem, so volunteering your time is well worth considering. Volunteer activities offer benefits for you and your community, plus there are many options to consider. You can find something that's suited to your needs and interests, and you can make it work for you. Read this to find out how volunteering builds your self-esteem.

Insecure thoughts keep you from being happy and impact one's entire wellbeing. Everyone is insecure in some capacity, including me. The problem is that insecurities can be insidious and take over your life. They can keep you from feeling confident enough to try the things you know will make you happy. You don’t get to live your life when you are letting your negative thoughts and insecurities run the show. You don’t have to let insecure thoughts keep you from being happy any more.

Learning to say no confidently is a challenge many people face, particularly those with low self-esteem. Too many people are afraid to say no and that comes with consequences. For example, it makes it very easy for others to take advantage of you and your own needs don’t get met. You might take on too many things or do things you resent doing. You could become overwhelmed, burned out, anxious, depressed, angry or bitter at the other person. This is not good for your physical or mental health. Learning to say no confidently is important for your own self-care and overall wellbeing.

Expecting too much from yourself is damaging to your self-esteem and overall wellbeing. It's good to have high standards, but it's important to be reasonable with yourself. Expecting too much from yourself can be associated with disappointment, burnout, anxiety, and depression, as well as low self-esteem. It's therefore in your best interest to stop expecting too much from yourself.