As upsetting and confusing as it can be to bring up the subject of AIDS with young children, it's essential to do so. By the time they reach third grade, research shows that as many as 93 percent of children have already heard about the illness. Yet, while kids are hearing about HIV/AIDS early on, what they are learning is often inaccurate and frightening. You can set the record straight -- if you know the facts yourself. HIV is transmitted from person to person through contact with blood, semen, vaginal fluid, or breast milk. HIV can be prevented by using latex condoms during sex, not sharing "drug needles," and avoiding contact with another person's bodily fluids. So stay informed. Sharing this information with your youngster can keep her safe and calm her fears. Finally, talking with your child about AIDS lays the groundwork for any future conversations about AIDS-preventative behavior. Here are some tips on how to get started:

Initiate discussion

Use a "talk opportunity" to introduce the subject of AIDS to your child. For example, try tying a discussion into something your child sees or hears, such as a commercial about AIDS. After you and your child watch the ad, say something like, "Have you heard about AIDS before? Well, what do you think AIDS is?" This way, you can figure out what she already understands and work from there.

Present the facts

Offer honest, accurate information that's appropriate to a child's age and development. To an 8-year-old you might say, "AIDS is a disease that makes people very sick. It's caused by a virus, called HIV, which is a tiny germ." An older child can absorb more detailed information: "Your body is made up of billions of cells. Some of these cells, called T-cells, help your body stay healthy by fighting off disease. But if you get a virus called HIV, that virus kills the T- cells. Over time, the body can't fight disease any more and that person has AIDS." Pre-teens should also understand how condoms could help protect people from getting AIDS and that the disease can be transmitted between persons who share drug needles. (If you have already explained sexual intercourse to your children, you might add, "During sexual intercourse, the semen from the man's body goes into the woman's body. That semen can carry HIV." If you have not yet talked about sex, don't bring it up during initial discussions about AIDS. It's not a good idea for your child's first information about sex to be associated with such a serious disease.)

Set them straight

Children's misconceptions about AIDS can be pretty scary, so it's important to correct them as soon as possible. Suppose your 8-year-old comes home from school one day, tearful because she fell down on the playground, scraped her knee and started bleeding -- and the other kids told her she would get AIDS. As a parent, you might explain, "No, you don't have AIDS. You're fine. You can't get AIDS from scraping your knee. The way you can get AIDS is when the fluids from your body mix with those of someone who has AIDS. Do you understand?" After such a discussion, it's also wise to check back with your child and see what she remembers. Understanding AIDS, particularly for young children, takes more than a single conversation.

Foster self-esteem

Praising our children frequently, setting realistic goals and keeping up with their interests are an effective way to build self-esteem. And that's important, because when kids feel good about themselves, they are much more likely to withstand peer pressure to have sex before they are ready, or to not do drugs. In short, they are less likely to engage in behavior that could put them at risk for AIDS.

Put Your Child's Safety First

Some adults mistakenly believe that AIDS is only a disease of homosexuals. Whatever your beliefs, try not to let your opinions or feelings prevent you from giving your child the facts about AIDS and its transmission -- it's information that's essential to their health and safety.

Be prepared to discuss death

When talking with your kids about AIDS, questions about death may come up. So get ready to answer them by reading books available at libraries or bookstores. In the meantime, here are three helpful tips:

• Explain death in simple terms. Explain that when someone dies, they don't breathe, or eat, or feel hungry or cold, and you won't see them again. Although very young children won't be able to understand such finality, that's okay. Just be patient and repeat the message whenever appropriate.

• Never explain death in terms of sleep. It may make your child worry that if he falls asleep, he'll never wake up.

• Offer reassurance. If appropriate, tell your child that you are not going to die from AIDS and that he won't either. Stress that while AIDS is serious, it is preventable.

Questions & Answers

What is AIDS?

AIDS is a very serious disease that is caused by a tiny germ called a virus. When you are healthy, your body can fight off diseases, like Superman fighting the bad guys. Even if you do get sick, your body can fight the germs and make you well again. But when you have AIDS, your body cannot protect you. That's why people with AIDS get very sick.

How do you get AIDS?

You can get AIDS when the fluids from your body mix with those of someone who has AIDS. You can't catch it like the flu and you can't get it just by touching or being near someone with AIDS, so you and I don't have to worry about getting it. (NOTE: If you have already talked with your child about sex, you should also add, "You can also get AIDS by having unprotected sexual intercourse with someone who has the HIV virus.")

Can kids get AIDS?

Very few children get AIDS. But if they were born to a mother who had AIDS, they could get AIDS when they were born. A long time ago, some kids who had hemophilia -- a disease that means their blood doesn't have enough good cells, so they need to get blood from other people -- got AIDS when they got blood. But that doesn't happen anymore. AIDS is mostly a disease of grownups. (NOTE: If your child already knows about the link between sex and AIDS, and IV drug use and AIDS, you might also add, "Sometimes teenagers who have unprotected sex or who share drug needles get AIDS." But you should still emphasize that "AIDS is mostly a disease of grown-ups.")

How can you tell from looking at someone if they have AIDS?

You can't. Anyone, regardless of what they look like, can have AIDS. People find out if they have AIDS after being tested by a doctor. Therefore, the only way to know if someone has AIDS is to ask him if he has been tested and if the test results were positive for HIV/AIDS.

Do all gay people get AIDS?

No. Homosexuals get AIDS the same way that heterosexuals do. And they can protect themselves the same way, too.

I Told You That You Are Not Alone!

I'm a Cutter

That's right, I'm a teenage cutter. I cut myself.

The cutting started my junior year of high school. It started small, as it usually does. I had never heard of self-mutilation. I didn't know that it was something that 1% of the population actually does! I had never met anyone who did this and my view on it at the time was..."God, how could someone even do that to themselves!"

Until I tried it.

I was on the phone with my best friend. She started talking about how sometimes she would scratch herself with a needle or razor. I think I said something like, "How can you do that? Doesn't it hurt?" Little did I know I would soon be answering these questions coming out of other people's mouths. She told me that it didn't hurt, so I tried it. I had a razor sitting on my desk... (looking back, I don't know why it was there in the first place)... and I lightly scratched my arm. There was no blood. I did it a few more times. I found that it caused my heart to pound, and it made me feel alive, but most importantly it made me feel in control. I had been considering suicide for about 4 years and I finally realized that if it got SO bad that I had to do something... I COULD!!!!

This made me feel better than I had felt in a long time. And that's where my cutting began.

Cutter with a Cutting Addiction

I started cutting regularly. What's regularly, you ask? In the beginning, it was around once a week. Then it gradually moved up to 2-3 times a week, to once a day, and eventually 4 - 5 times a day. It was like having a cutting addiction.

I stopped eating lunch in the cafeteria and started locking myself in the bathroom and cutting while I ate. Now that's an addiction to cutting! A few times, the blood seeped through to my jeans and if anyone asked, I always told them that I spilled ketchup or chocolate on me at lunch. I used to make cuts on my arms in 3's. This way, if anyone asked about the cuts or self-harm scars, I could say a cat scratched me. (Find out how to tell someone you self-injure) I would wear sweaters in the summer, one of the key signs or symptoms of self-injury, and I would never, ever, EVER put on a bathing suit. (I still can't today because of the scars).

Where did I cut? Anywhere that could be hidden by my gym uniform. (At this time, I had already started changing in the bathroom so that the other girls didn't see my cuts). This meant shoulders, upper arms, stomach, thighs, and ankles. I also tried to slice up my wrists, but this wasn't really a suicide attempt. I'm not sure what it was. I read somewhere that "Suicide is the exact opposite of self-mutilation. People who commit suicide want to die. People who self-mutilate just want to feel better." You can read more about suicide and self-harm here.

Cutting Myself Deeply

Now that I was cutting more frequently, I was also cutting deeper. Some of the cuts would bleed for up to 3 days non-stop. I started to scare myself, my friends started to get scared, and my parents FREAKED. They started to accuse me of being on drugs, being crazy. Actually, they didn't know what to think.

This all landed me in a doctor's office with 3 prescriptions and therapy sessions three times a week, but this didn't change my behavior. I didn't want to change. Eventually, I landed myself in a mental hospital for 2 weeks. I still wasn't ready to change. I learned all of the self-injury alternatives. I was taking medication for my depression and seeing doctors, but none of it did me any good. You can't help someone feel better who doesn't want to get better.

"My parents said, 'forget it.'"

Eventually, my parents got frustrated, and all of this was so expensive that they just said: "forget it." In a way, that made me feel like I was really a lost cause like there was NO hope.

I'm a Cutter. My Scars are Badges of Honor

Four years later, what has changed that made me want to seek help? Not much really. I have hundreds of scars on my body, especially on my upper thighs, but they are fading, and I haven't cut that badly for some time. Sometimes, the fact that they are going away scares me. I don't want to lose my scars. They kind of symbolize what I've gone through with this thing.

I never want to forget that I am a cutter. Right now, it doesn't seem likely that I will. Since I have come to college, I've cut several times. I don't let myself buy disposable razors anymore because they are too easy for me to take apart. So when I get desperate enough, I use push pins from my bulletin board, but last week I cracked. I used the double bladed razors that I shave my legs with. I didn't think I could take them apart. However, when you get desperate enough, you can do virtually anything.

Why did I crack? I don't know. I was very panicky and I just needed to assure myself that I was in control. It calms me down. I always do it in front of a mirror. The sight of my blood proves to me that I am still alive, and sometimes I question that. I really do. I needed the reminder. So I did it... I cut. Not really badly, but the worst I've done since coming to college this year.

So I am on Prozac now and I do see doctors, but sometimes I wonder if it's worth it. I'm not sure how it's all supposed to help. Granted, I've only been back on meds and with doctors for a month now, but I don't feel any different.

The most frustrating thing about this whole situation is that I don't know how to stop self-injuring. I don't know how to make this better. I mean it's me. You think that I could just say I'm not going to cut anymore. Yet, somehow it's much harder than that. You have to want to stop. And even though I know that I should, that doesn't mean I do.

How do you make yourself stop something you love doing??? How do you wave good-bye? Right now, I don't have an answer to that. I'm hoping that someday in the future I do. This isn't easy. In fact, stopping is probably the hardest thing I've ever done. Like I said, I'm not just a teenager cutting myself. I think I'm a cutter with a cutting addiction.

My personal cutting story is very difficult for me to write. I'm not even sure how to begin.

My cutting story begins with the fact that I am a 33-year-old female adoptee (yes, adults self-harm) with two teenage sons who my parents are raising. I have been in and out of therapy since I was 9 years old and have been self-injury cutting semi-regularly since I was about 12. I cut myself deep enough to require stitches twice. However, looking back on it, my self-harm wasn't about suicide. I didn't want to die, I just wanted to feel something - anything.

I remember when I was about 5 or 6 telling my mom I had bad blood. I don't think I even really knew what I meant, but that has stuck with me throughout my life. It's one of the amazing parts of my cutting story. I have "fought" myself in regards to the cutting and absolutely refused to cut and have been totally miserable. Prozac has helped up to this point, but it's almost like it's not helping anymore. Maybe in some ways I am getting healthier... I don't know. The impulse to cut and run and do other destructive activities has slowed down a lot, but every now and then, it still pops up. When I feel like I need to cut now, I do.

Thousands of Cutters: I'm Not Alone

I've been diagnosed with everything: bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder, depression, borderline personality disorder, multiple personality disorder... you name it. The therapist I've been seeing for the last year-and-a-half for cutting help and treatment for cutting and other problems is very helpful. He realizes it's about getting through the feelings of why I do the things I do, and it's not about locking me up anymore (a "habit" my parents got into when they couldn't control me when I was growing up). A couple of months ago, after a therapy session (after I had started cutting again), I went to the bookstore and found A Bright Red Scream by Marilee Strong. Just in the first few pages, I was so relieved that I'm not alone, I'm not crazy, and that what I feel about when and why I self-harm is normal for cutters. My mom and dad are even starting to understand more about cutting. It's about release, not dying.

My younger son has impulse problems (they're getting better though) and my older son is also on Prozac (he is ADD). Both my sons are very intelligent and sensitive young men. Even with what I've been through, watching my parents deal with the problems with my children instead of just having them locked up has been wonderful for my growth and gives my being raised the way I was kind of a purpose. I don't know if that makes sense or not... Come to think about it, I don't know if any of this has made any sense. I'm not even sure why I wrote this to you other than I guess I want to say that there is hope.

Other than the occasional cutting, my life is more "normal" and stable than I could have ever asked for. I have two jobs that I love. I'm in a relationship with a man who is sensitive and supportive of me (even with the cutting - he's even trying to understand it!!). I have a good relationship with my boys and my parents. I have a few wonderful friends and, for the most part, most of the time, am very very happy.

That's my cutting story. Thanks for letting me share it. I hope it helps someone.

I know you're wondering why people cut themselves. I'm going to give you the answer to that.

My name is Krysten. I'm 16 years old, and I live in a small town in northern New Jersey. I'm a junior in high school, and until recently, I've gotten all A's and B's. I'm a member of National Honor Society, the oldest child in my family, a writer for the school paper, and a co-editor for the school literary magazine. Both my parents live in the same house with me, and I have one little brother named Matt. Pretty normal life, right?

I'm also a diagnosed major depressive. And I'm into self-injury.

Why Would You Cut Yourself?

The first question that comes to people's minds and mouths is "Why?" Why would someone purposely harm themselves? Why would you cut yourself? For me, it's one of the only forms of relief I have from living with depression. It's a way I can take charge of my emotions when I feel them. I hate confrontation, and I never feel I can fight back because my greatest fear is being abandoned by the people I care about. I tend to lose a lot of best friends, and my mother and I can barely stay in the same room for five minutes without exploding into argument... or she does, while I sit there quietly.

In ninth grade, when I was 13, I went through one of the periods of depression that I've experienced for several years now. A friend of mine had gotten hooked on the world of drinking and casual sex. I had discovered that another friend was on drugs. My parents haven't had a peaceful marriage for years, but that year was particularly volatile. I remember starting out small, just experimentally, wanting to "see how much I could take." It wasn't much... I scratched my arm a little with fingernails and paper clips and pricked myself with sewing needles a couple of times. It stopped after a few weeks. The depression didn't, though. That went on for years after, sometimes dormant, but eventually rearing it's ugly head again, and becoming increasingly more severe when it did. I didn't know what to do about it, so I did nothing.

At the beginning of school this year, I was thrown into the worst depression yet. My best friend and the guy I was in love with, Brandon, who I met over the Internet, came up to visit me and fell in love with my only close friend in my town, Heather. Their secret was carried out for a few weeks behind my back before I found out about it. Once I did, Brandon showed no remorse, and Heather broke down into pieces. Desperate to fix both of their lives, I tried to put up a front that I could deal with losing the only two people in my life that I had trusted. I put up a front that everything was okay. It wasn't.

People Cut Themselves Because It Makes Them Feel Better

One day I swung my shoulder bag over one shoulder, and the braid of wire that my house key dangles from caught the skin of my arm at the sharp end and left a long red scratch in my skin. As I looked at it, I realized that this didn't hurt. It intrigued me. My days were incredibly difficult to get through, especially trying not to let on how severe my depression had gotten. Now, here was something that distracted me. I went home that night and disassembled my little key chain, coming up with a thick piece of wire with two razor sharp ends (we use it in art class for sculptures). I dragged one end across my arm and red welts popped up. It didn't hurt, oddly. It felt good - right, somehow. I put the wire away and thought nothing of it.

Soon after that, I forced myself to get a therapist, something which was incredibly hard for me, because I've always counted on my ability to get through everything ON MY OWN, with no outside help. I was diagnosed with major depression. When my parents were told about this, they found it difficult to comprehend, and my mother eventually chose to either ignore it or not care about it. Nothing's changed between us since she learned about what I was going through.

"Scars and blood say more for me than words ever could."

Although my therapist has taken away my cutting implements a few times, I've managed to find more. I've gotten worse over the past few weeks, and rapidly. Now, whenever my parents yell at me, which I absolutely cannot take in my state of mind, even over something small, I start shaking. I go into my room and lock the door and frantically go about raising blood drops on my skin until I feel calm again. By now, if I don't bleed, I don't feel better. The sight of my own blood spilling forth sets me back in control. I like to think when I cut, "Okay, now all the pain in your head is in your skin." Once the scratches and cuts stop hurting, I do it again and feel calm again. I refuse to cry in front of people whenever I can help it, so I cut instead. I can count two dozen self-injury scars or cuts on my forearms, which is mainly where I injure myself. When there are absolutely no implements available and I am hurting emotionally beyond what I can take, I hit myself in my shoulders until they bruise. There are lots of ways to self-injure.

It's becoming hard to wear short-sleeved shirts, because there is no excuse for the battlefield people can see when I turn my arm over. The lines are straight, perfect, and parallel. They are obviously signs of self-injury. So I wear long-sleeved shirts constantly. Only one person beside my therapist knows I do this, and some of my friends online that do it as well. I panic when the scars fade, because, like Kris said in her article "I'm a Cutter. A Teenager Cutting Myself: "being a cutter, it is the scars that make me remember." Scars put it in front of me that I have a choice besides emotional pain, and that it is an easier choice. I used to think I had a low pain threshold. Part of me sees strength in what I do now, and I can't see myself wanting to stop anytime soon, even if I should. And there are words I can't or won't speak to people in my scars. Scars and blood say more for me then words ever could.

Emotions of People Cutting Themselves

How I Feel...

In speaking to other cutters, I believe the emotions I feel are similar to those of other people cutting themselves. Before I cut, I'm usually feeling a great deal of self-loathing. I can't ever remember liking myself, but over the past years, I've hated everything about me, from my looks to my attitude to my unstable personal relationships. Before I cut, something has usually happened to worsen this. I'm usually extremely depressed and feeling hopeless and worthless, as if I have no one to turn to. Sometimes I'm angry at myself for something I've done and see it as my punishment. Other times, I feel as if my entire body and mind has gone numb. Normally, when I have what most people call a "good day," I get this sweeping numbness in place of depression... and it scares me. Cutting brings me back down to earth, so to speak. Depression, rotten as it is, is what I'm used to.

While I'm cutting, I usually concentrate on raising blood, and my mind settles into a flat calm. I do not feel my emotional pain once marks begin to raise on my skin, but it's not the same as numbness. I do feel the calm and the feeling that my pain is draining from mind into body. Afterwards, sometimes I feel guilty, but that's usually a little while after. Most of the time, an hour or so after I cut, I'll start thinking thoughts like, "What the hell is wrong with you?" A lot of the time, I tell myself how crazy I am, which adds to the self-loathing. Eventually, someone will say or do something within the next day that triggers me, and this will combine with my self-hatred and make me lock myself in my room again.

Now, hopefully, you have a better idea of why people cut themselves. You might also find it interesting to read about the common personality traits of self-injurers.

I got sick at age 13. Self-injury had taken over due to depression and psychosis. They later put me in a foster home. I continued my self-injury behaviors because it helped me to release my inner torment and allowed me to see myself bleed and suffer externally. On the outside, it didn't hurt. It would last approximately 30-60 minutes and then I'd be suffering all over again.

At age 19, my therapist, Mary, at United Way, took me to a psychiatric emergency room and had me evaluated. I got admitted. All throughout my 20s, I continued to hurt myself, taking out my inner agony on me. I liked the self-harm scars. I referred to them as battle wounds when somebody would inquire. I continued to cut my arms all over and, at times, my knees. Periodically, I would need stitches. I've had several therapists attempt to help me with self-injury, though they all failed. The following story I mailed to HealthyPlace tells what happened later.

"I haven't cut myself all year..."

I'm Janie. I suffer from Major Depression, Schizoaffective Disorder, and Borderline Personality Disorder. I have been a cutter since age 13; that's 30 years ago. I would not injure myself to kill myself, just to take away the agony I felt internally. It would last approximately a half-hour and then I 'd be hurting all over. I liked that anybody could see all my slash marks. They would see all the agony I suffered and not bother me at all. And when I would go to self-injury treatment, the therapists would see them. They would understand I'm suffering. When I was younger I had to cover them up. I didn't want anyone to see the signs of self-mutilation. As an adult who self-harms, it didn't matter.

Eleven years ago, I got a therapist, who after one year together drew up a self-injury contract. By that time, we had developed enough trust and we both hoped I would follow a contract. It told me I couldn't hurt myself anymore, anywhere. I also had to promise that I can't kill myself no matter what; even if something were to happen to my cat (I loved my cat, Baley).

That was the roughest year. The contract also stated that if I wanted to voluntarily enter the psych hospital, I had to have her approval to do that. I had been going to the hospital every other month and now I had to check with my therapist before I went in. If she felt I could make it on the outside, I couldn't go to the hospital.

It has been the hardest time I've ever had, but believe it or not, I didn't cut myself all year and never entered the hospital. It shocks me because I used to slash myself up on a daily basis and attempt suicide every other month or so. Now, as a self-harm alternative, I shave the sides of my head when I feel agonized. It gives me a Mohawk, like an Indian going to war, only I am warring with myself. That's cutting treatment that works.

A mother and daughter tell their story about self-harm and how they finally got the strength to get self-injury help.

Dawn was a junior in high school when her self-injury secret was discovered - she was practicing self-harm, she was cutting herself. That was eight years ago. Today, Dawn is nearly 25 and has transformed herself and her life. She has focused her career goals on helping others with emotional problems.

Dawn and her mother, Deb, hope that in sharing their story, they can help other families come to grips with the problem of cutting.

A Sheltered, Strict Childhood

Looking back, Dawn can see what went wrong. Things just weren't right at home. "I always felt, when I was a kid growing up, a lot of anger, but I didn't know what to do with it," she tells WebMD. "I wasn't really allowed to get angry at home, to express my anger."

Her father demanded perfection from her, Dawn says. "Also, I lived an extremely sheltered, controlled life as a child. I was really shy, real passive. I didn't have hobbies or activities. I didn't belong to clubs. I was always by myself, always in my room. I didn't have a whole lot of friends."

Her mother has the same memories. "Dawn's father was very strict with her when she was growing up," says Deb. "Let's face it, you're the product of how you were raised - and he was raised by a really mean father who was very strict. He demanded that Dawn be perfect. I was just 19 when I got married, and at that age I let him take the lead as far as discipline. I wasn't as strong as I am today. It was only later that I realized, this just isn't right."

When Dawn was age 10, her brother was born. As often happens, the second-born didn't face the same strict discipline that Dawn had. "Her father and I were older then, and we let some things go, her father wasn't as strict with him," Deb says. "That was hard for Dawn."

Dawn was becoming more isolated. "My brother was a real small baby, and my parents were really busy with him. Yet I was going through all this stuff, having a really hard time."

By age 13, Dawn was making threats to kill herself. She went into counseling, but things didn't get better, her mother says. By age 14, she was seeing a psychiatrist and was diagnosed with depression.

There was something else no one suspected. Dawn had begun cutting herself. "I'd never heard of self-injury cutting," she says. "I thought I'd made it up. For me, it was something that I thought might make me feel better. It was like, I'm going to do this and see what happens."

Hiding the Cuts

In the beginning, she didn't cut herself very often, Dawn explains. "I started to see it was making me feel better, so I kept doing it. I would do it in the bathroom at school... hiding in a stall during lunch time. I used a paper clip that I would sharpen with a file. I just did a lot of little shallow cuts... I didn't want to need stitches. I hid it for so long because I never needed medical attention."

Dawn was hiding her cuts under long-sleeved clothes, another self-injury warning sign that no one noticed.

At one point, Dawn mentioned the cutting to a psychiatrist, who shrugged it off as "typical adolescence," she says. That left Dawn with a clear message, "I didn't think there was anything wrong with it. The more upset I got, the more I would do it. By the time I was 16, I was doing it almost every day."

But Deb suspected that things weren't right with her daughter. She began reading Dawn's diary. In it, she found drawings that showed deep sadness. She found one drawing of cutting marks on a person's arms, and she knew that person was her daughter.

"As a mother, you don't want to think your child is that unhappy ... it just boggled my mind," explains Deb. "Even when I saw clues that something was wrong, I would push them away." But she did some reading about self-harm and cutting. Then she confronted her daughter, as well as her daughter's therapist.

Everything came to a head - with Dawn finally admitting that she was cutting herself. The therapist pulled out of the case, saying she didn't feel comfortable handling it. Deb kept her daughter home from school the next day. "I sat at the phone and made a gazillion phone calls in this area to find someone who knew about self-injury treatment. From a local therapist, thank God, I found the SAFE (Self Abuse Finally Ends) Alternatives program."

Getting Treatment

Dawn spent a week as an inpatient at SAFE Alternatives, located in Naperville, Ill. The program provides both inpatient and outpatient treatment for self-injurers. For the rest of her junior year, she was treated on an outpatient basis - taking high school classes at the hospital, while also getting counseling. A van picked her up at home in the morning and brought her home at night.

For her senior year, Dawn went back to her old high school. "That was major," Deb says. "Through the gossip trail, people knew. It was very hard for her to face, but she did it. She graduated with her class. She did very well."

Deb has seen big changes in her daughter. What's helped most, Dawn says, is learning to understand why she was injuring herself. "Now that I can, like, identify what makes me want to do it, it makes it easier to do other things and not do it. I can see the warning signs, like when I start to isolate myself, so I can stop the cycle before it starts."

Deb and her daughter have had many heart-to-heart talks. "I've told her, 'You shouldn't be embarrassed, you should be proud -- proud for all you've been through. You're a tremendous human being. You should view yourself from afar, give yourself a lot of credit for that instead of beating yourself up.'"

Read and watch more self-injury stories.

article references

Self-injury stories, similar to self-harm quotes and movies about self-injury, bring understanding and hope to others caught in the web of self-destruction and pain. Some of these self-harm stories may trigger vulnerable people to engage in self-injury. So it's important to take care when reading them, or watching video stories about self-injury, if you're prone to these behaviors.

How Self Harm Stories Help

Writing self-harm stories not only offers the reassurance to others struggling with this issue that they're not alone, it can also serve as a creative catharsis for self-injurious individuals. People, who write or make videos about the challenges they face in life and their coping techniques -- even when those techniques are unhealthy -- allow some of their inner turmoil to escape through their work. It doesn't remove the need for therapy but can provide some personal relief for self mutilators, including adults who self-harm.

Read and Watch Self Injury Stories

Read the self-injury stories below or watch the video about one person's experience with self-harm.

Self Injury: One Family's Story – A mother and daughter share their story about self-injury, when they first realized something wasn't right, and how they finally gathered the strength to get professional help.

Teen Shares Self-Injury Secret – This self-harm story includes a video and a journalist's report about his interview with Alicia Moore, a 17-year-old self-injurer. Moore says that self-injury had become a "dangerous addiction" for her. A brilliant student and talented musician and dancer, Moore recounts how others taunted her for being smart and studying music and dance. She claims they made her hate her talents, gifts, and intelligence – she felt devastated.

Cutting Stories

These cutting stories come from a mixture of teenagers and adults. Their stories of cutting are compelling, insightful and some offer hope that things will get better.

My Personal Cutting Story - Mindy's cutting story is from an adult perspective, being a cutter for over 21 years. It's been a long journey. See if things are getting better for Mindy.

I'm a Cutter. A Teenager Cutting Myself - Kris is a cutter. It started out innocently enough with a phone conversation with a friend. Soon, it became a cutting addiction. And she doesn't see any reason to stop.

People Who Cut. That's Me. Self-Injury Cutter - Ren started cutting when she was 9 years old. As her cutting story progresses, she talks about being outed in her college dorm room. For the uninitiated, she's happy to tell you why she cuts at the end of the story.

My Cutting Experience: A Recovery Story - Janie has been through hell and back. After reading her story, you might say "no wonder she's cutting." In the end though, she's figured out a way to stop cutting.

I'll Tell You Why People Cut Themselves - The first question always is "why?" Krysten's happy to sum it up for you in 5 words. I found it to be one of the most interesting cutting stories I've read.

The Internet abounds with self-mutilation stories, stories about self-harm and injury. While many of these encourage those who cope with inner turmoil and pain via self-injury to seek help, a shocking number of stories and videos out there glamorize self-harm activities. Some include disparaging commentary toward those who wish to help self mutilators find professional self-injury treatment and recover. That is just one of the reasons why pro self-harm websites are so dangerous.

Read these self-harm stories and watch the videos with caution. If you are an individual who engages in self-injury, remember there is a way out and a path to recovery.

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Hollywood and television offer only a few movies about self-injury that focus entirely on the issue, but others exist that include segments or references to self-injury cutting and other types of self-harm. Below is a list of television shows and movies about self-mutilation and other forms of self-injury, including one compelling documentary.

Television Shows and Movies About Self Injury

Please note that television shows and movies about self-injury may contain images and themes that increase the urge to self injure (much like self-harm pictures and photos can trigger feelings). If you engage in self-harm behaviors, watch with caution and when in a safe place.

Secret Cutting (Painful Secrets)

Produced and aired by the USA Network, this movie about self-injury stars Robert Wisden, Sean Young, and Kimberlee Peterson. Dawn (Peterson) is a teen girl full of profound pain and emotional overload. She copes with her overwhelming feelings by cutting herself. This movie explores the disturbing and growing phenomenon of adolescent girls engaging in self-injury behaviors. This link takes you to the IMDb site about this moving drama and includes a video trailer of the film.

Sharing the Secret

This drama debuted in 2000 and stars Mare Winningham, Alison Lohman, and Lawrence Monoson. The movie is about a teen girl who feels she must always appear happy to please her parents. She enters into a world of secret binging and purging to cope with the pressure. Watch part 1 (of 10 total) of the movie on YouTube here.

28 Days

Billed as a comedy and a drama, this movie, featuring Sandra Bullock and Viggo Mortensen, follows an urban newspaper columnist who is forced to enter a drug and alcohol rehabilitation center after some very bad behavior at her sister's wedding. While it's not about self-injury, per se, it does include scenes that talk about cutting and other forms of self-harm. Go to the IMDb site for the movie to read a full cast listing and watch the trailer.

Thirteen

A thirteen-year-old girl's relationship puts her relationship with her mother to the test in this coming of age film that explores drugs, sex, and petty crime as well as including scenes and dialogue about cutting. Starring Evan Rachel Wood, Holly Hunter, and Nikki Reed. See the full cast listing and watch the trailer on the official IMDb site.

Perfection

A not-yet-released independent film that explores the clandestine world of self-injury, using humor and offering healing and hope. Read more about this self-injury movie, see production still, and get a cast listing on the "Perfection: The Movie" website. This promises to be one of the best movies about self-harm yet.

Cut: Teens and Self Injury

This documentary gives viewers an intimate look at the growing problem of self-injury and self-harm among teens. Counselors use the film, as well as many education professionals who deal with high-risk teens in their teaching environments. Check out the Cut: Teens and Self Injury website to view a trailer, read reviews, or purchase a DVD.

These self-injury movies provide insight into these disturbing behaviors as well as possible hope for those entangled in the secret and largely unacknowledged world of self-mutilation and harm.

For additional insight, check out these self-harm quotes and celebrities who self-harm (like Demi Lovato and Johnny Depp). For self-injury stories, go here.

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Celebrities and Self Harm

Celebrities and self-harm have gotten more media attention than ever before with breaking stories about Miley Cyrus. Allegations that Cyrus engages in self-injury cutting began to emerge in May 2012 when pictures surfaced in the media showing definite cuts on her wrists. Rumors that the 19-year-old is a self-harmer and has an eating disorder abound on the Internet. The singer tweeted a photo of herself sniffing a bag of takeout food with the caption, "Can't eat it so I'm just gonna smell the sh** out of it! My mouth is literally watering."

Famed singer and songwriter, Fiona Apple, endured rape at age 12 outside her mother's apartment. She says that she checked her closets to make certain no one was hiding in the house for years afterward. Even as an adult, she claims to suffer from horrible, violent dreams due to the experience; one of the effects of rape. During her teen years, Apple suffered from an eating disorder, saying that she had become terribly depressed after the sexual assault. Her first album, Tidal, received poor reviews. It was after these biting reviews that she began scratching her wrists with her fingernails until her skin bled, which is one of the ways to self-harm.

British comedian and actor, Russell Brand, talked about self-injury as a teen in his autobiography, My Booky Wook: A Memoir of Sex, Drugs, and Stand-Up. He admitted in a "Time Out Chicago" interview that, in the past, doctors had diagnosed him with bipolar disorder and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. He says that it's difficult to discern which of those diagnoses were accurate, since he was heavy into drugs and cutting at the time. "I get fixated when I'm bleeding – I can see why they went in for blood-letting in medieval times because it makes you feel a bit better. When I cut myself, the drama of it calms me down," says Brand. (read: Why I Self-Harm: Why People Self-Injure)

Demi Lovato and Self Injury

The Demi Lovato self-injury story on her own MTV Special, Stay Strong, reveals her ongoing battle with self-harm and an eating disorder. The singer courageously opened up about her struggles in the hour-long documentary. She admits that she has cut herself and purged since receiving treatment, but that she will continue in her fight for recovery. Demi says she came forward and spoke so candidly about it because she still feels vulnerable and knows that someone, some girl or boy, out there needs to hear her story. (more self-injury, self-harm stories)

Celebrities who self injure, like others who do the same, tend to keep it to themselves. It's not about getting attention. It's about getting relief. So, when they come forward and share their challenges and personal struggles with self-injury, people must listen to their words and their account of the journey. These can serve to help people dealing with a variety of challenges – not just self-harm.

"Some people go shopping – I cut myself." ~Angelina Jolie, 1995, ABC News

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Trust is an important quality in Healthy Sex. It helps us feel emotionally safe and secure about choosing to remain in an intimate relationship with our partner. Without trust, we're likely to feel growing amounts of anxiety, fear, disappointment and betrayal.

Trust grows when both people in the relationship act responsibly and follow-through with commitments. While no one can guarantee that any relationship will last and remain satisfying for both people, you can strengthen mutual trust by having clear understandings about what you expect from each other in the relationship.

Spend time with your partner discussing what you need and expect in the relationship for you to feel emotionally safe. Based on your discussion, create a list of understandings you will both agree to honor. You may want to formalize your list into an actual "contract"  you will follow. Below is an example of a Healthy Sex trust contract.

These mutual understandings are often important to building trust in a healthy sexual relationship. Feel free to use this sample list to help you and your partner in generating your own set of relationship ground rules.

We agree that:

• It's okay to say no to sex at ANY TIME.

• It's okay to ask for what we want sexually, without being teased or shamed for it.

• We don't ever have to do anything we don't want to do sexually.

• We will take a break or stop sexual activity whenever either of us requests it.

• It's okay to say how we are feeling or what we are needing at ANY TIME.

• We agree to be responsive to each other's needs for improving physical comfort.

• What we do sexually is private and not to be discussed with others outside our relationship unless we give permission to discuss it.

• We are each ultimately responsible for our own sexual fulfillment and orgasm.

• Our sexual thoughts and fantasies are our own and we don't have to share them with each other unless we want to reveal them.

• We don't have to disclose the details of a previous sexual relationship unless that information is important to our present partner's physical health or safety.

• We can initiate or decline sex without incurring a negative reaction from our partner.

• We each agree to be sexually monogamous unless we have a clear, prior understanding that it's okay to have sex outside the relationship (this includes virtual sex, such as phone or internet sex).

• We will support each other in minimizing risk and using protection to decrease the possibility of disease and/or unwanted pregnancy.

• We will each agree to be medically tested for sexually transmitted disease at any time.

• We will notify each other immediately if we have or suspect we have a sexually transmitted infection.

• We will notify each other if we suspect or know that a pregnancy has occurred from our lovemaking.

• We will support each other in handling any negative consequences that may result from our lovemaking.